Because I Love Him
by Sugar Pink
Summary: Some things are better left known, yet unsaid. Just like Sakura's love for Li. Why doesn't she take advantage of his break up with another girl? Why does she sacrifice, stand idly by, & watch him find love with someone else? Because she loves him. OneShot


**Sugar Pink:** Hey, everyone! I just had an urge to write a one-shot! Since I can't update my chaptered stories as frequently now because of school, I thought I'll just do some random one-shots.

Oh, I also borrowed some ideas from the anime Love Hina. Just a bit though.

All About Him 

The soft flakes flutter gently, landing on the foggy glass panes and slowly start to melt. More flakes follow the example, and soon, the glass panes are dripping water.

A young man at the age of 19 sat alone on the cold snow as his brilliant amber eyes glance across the frozen lake and towards the tall clock tower as it chimes; the sound echoing back to his own two ears.

The young man tightened his forest green scarf around his neck and let out a small shiver, yet, he stay where he is, not moving.

He needs time to think.

* * *

"_She's just a friend!"_

"_Then why were you with her last night?"_

"_She needed help with math! You don't want her to fail out of Toudai after we all worked so hard to get in, do you?"_

"_Why didn't you answer your phone?"_

"_The batteries were dead!!"_

"_You two have been spending everyday together!! Do I cease to exist to you anymore?"_

"_Oh for goodness sakes, it's just Sakura! Why are you so jealous?"_

"_Can you blame me, Syaoran? Can you blame me?"_

* * *

The young man shoves his hands into his jacket pockets. _It was just Sakura…she's just a friend…why did she have to…_

* * *

"_It doesn't feel very secure to be in a relationship with you, Syaoran. Everyone knows that Sakura has a crush on you since freshmen year, yet you run off with her and don't care about how I feel!"_

"_That's a lie, Karu! You know I love you."_

"_You sure are doing a good job of showing it," was the sarcastic reply._

"_What is that suppose to mean?"_

"_It means, either you cut back some time with Sakura or we're over!"_

"_I'm not going to lose a friend just because you don't trust me to love you enough."_

"_Either you cut back time with Sakura, or we're over," was the reply again._

"_Sakura has been my friend since freshmen year! I'm not going to sit by and watch her fail second year calculus in Toudai!"_

"_You haven't answered me, Syaoran. Either you cut back time with Sakura or we're over. Take your pick."_

_He stays quiet. "I love you," was all he said. "You know that."_

"_If you love me, then you will do what you can to make me feel safe and secure and not worry that Sakura Kinomoto is going to whisk you away from me! How do you expect me to not feel upset knowing that you're spending time with a girl who has a crush on you since freshmen high school year!"_

"_She does **not** have a crush on me!"_

"_Everyone knows she does! Either you cut back time with her, or we're over. Choose." She looks at him with her tranquil hazel eyes._

"_I can't."_

"_Fine. Are you going to cut back time with Sakura?"_

"_No."_

"_Then I guess we only have one option left."_

_And with that, she turned around, tears falling freely, walking away from him. Forever._

* * *

The young man continues to sit motionless, blinking back tears in his amber eyes. His three years relationship was shattered.

_I love her,_ he thought bitterly to himself.

"Syaoran?" a soft voice said behind him. He turns to find a girl his own age with long auburn hair and big emerald green eyes. A worried expression graces her pretty face as she sits down next to him in the snow.

"Hey," he responds softly, his breath causing little white puffs to appear in the crispy winter air.

"Why are you out here?" she asks.

"I just need to think some things through," he shrugs, allowing his gaze to drift back towards the grand clock tower.

"At this time? On the campus? In this weather?" she asks, deeply intrigued.

He nods. "Yup."

"Oh, I see," she said a while after. "What are you thinking about?"

"Karumi. We…broke up."

She gasps. "What?! Why?! When?!"

"We broke up. She felt insecure. Just three hours ago."

"What?! You guys have been together for such a long time! Three years!"

"I know."

"Why does she feel insecure?" she asks.

Syaoran hesitates. _I can't tell her that Karu was jealous of her. Knowing Sakura, she'll take the blame, even though it's not her fault._

"I guess because of my popularity among girls," he forced out a slight smirk.

"Syaoran, don't joke. You have to tell her you love her!"

"How do you know I love her?"

"I can tell."

Syaoran sighs, causing another wave of small white puffs to blown into the air. "Too bad she can't."

Sakura stays silent. "I know how you feel, Syaoran-kun."

"Do you?"

"Yes."

"Why are you so sure?"

"Because I know how it feels to love someone and have them not understand."

Syaoran remains silent.

"I fell in love with a boy ever since freshmen year in high school." Sakura began, sensing Syaoiran's silence.

Syaoran tenses.

"I met him in class. I had an all out crush on him in first year. He never notices me in that way though."

* * *

"_Ow, Syaoran! Stop it!" A thirteen years old Sakura winces as Syaoran accidentally knocks into her sore left arm._

"_Sorry! I forgot your homeroom got immunizations already. I'm getting mines after lunch."_

"_It hurts. You're going to cry like a baby." Sakura grins._

"_Only you do that, Sakura. I'm the knight in shining armour for girls. I don't cry." Syaoran smirks._

_Sakura rolls her eyes._

"_Hey, Syaoran! Want to come watch us practice?" a girl from Sakura's homeroom chirps, waving her pompoms around. "We're having cheerleading practice."_

"_Sure, I'll be there. Come on, Sakura." Syaoran tug Sakura along, missing the frown on the cheerleader's face._

"_Don't you just love watching them practice?" Syaoran grins, eying the girls._

**

* * *

**

"Do you know why I joined cheerleaders back in second year, Syaoran?"

"Because you were a great athlete and the gym coach recommended you, right?"

"No."

"But that's what you told me." He gives her a confuse look.

"I lied," Sakura smiles sheepishly.

"Then…what was the real reason?"

"He likes cheerleaders."

"What a guy," Syaoran rolls his eyes. "Typical."

Sakura giggles.

"What other things have you done for this guy?" Syaoran asks out of curiosity.

"Well, there was that time in third year…"

**

* * *

**

"_Kaijuu, get to sleep!!" a sixteen years old boy with dark hair rolls his eyes as he walks pass his little sister's room. "It's almost 1AM and you have school tomorrow."_

"_I'm not a monster! And I have to learn the lines for tomorrow's winter play tryouts. I'm going for the part of Snow White."_

"_You? Snow White? Don't make me laugh! Ow, hey!! Don't throw pillows at me!"_

"_Let me rehearse, onii-chan!!"_

"_You're such a monster. You'll be more suited for the wicked witch! Ow, hey!!!"_

_**

* * *

**_

"_Sakura! They posted up the list of all the people who made the play!!" Tomoyo screams excitedly, pulling Sakura towards the auditorium._

_Sakura's excited emerald green eyes scan the list. Her face falls in depression and her emerald eyes filled with tears, which she quickly blinks back before they fell._

"_I…I'm the wicked witch!" Sakura cried._

"_Aww…don't be sad Sakura-chan! Without the witch, there will be no story!" Tomoyo gives a sympathetic smile._

"_I…I guess." Sakura sighs dejectedly. She glances at the list again. "Syaoran got the role of the prince!"_

" _I did??" an excited voice calls over Sakura's shoulder. Sakura's cheeks flame up in red hue as she notices Syaoran standing so closely behind her because people behind him were pushing him._

"_yeah, you did, Syaoran." Sakura said._

"_Great! Who's my Snow White?"_

_Sakura glances back at the list. "Karumi is."_

"_Hmm…she's cute."_

_Sakura winces and felt awful for the rest of the day._

**

* * *

**

"Which role did he get in the play?" Syaoran asks, looking at her intently with his amber eyes.

"Oh um…he didn't make it." Sakura lies, not meeting his eyes. "He um…got a part doing backstage stuff, like painting the sceneries. But…he worked very closely with another girl because of that play…and they fell in love. And then from that day on, they were together." Sakura said, fidgeting.

Syaoran looks at her. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's not your fault, don't' be sorry." Sakura shrugs.

"Seeing that you're still single…you two never ended up together?"

"No. We just graduated and I've been trying to move on ever since. Remember how we had eight classes in senior year, and in each of those class the sensei put us into study groups so we can prepare for exams?"

"Yeah, do I ever. That kooky principal and his weird ideas…since I had eight classes, I had eight different study groups." Syaoran laughs, reminiscing.

"Well…he was in one of my eight study groups." Sakura said.

**

* * *

**

"_Wow, finally they're all gone! We studied for nine hours straight!" Syaoran flops back on the sofa, letting out a sigh. "Are you ready for the math exam tomorrow morning, Saku?"_

"_I think so. I want to stay here a bit more to study."_

"_Yeah, we should do that. We'll probably get more done with just the two of us." Syaoran said. "It's almost eleven o'clock." Syaoran observes._

"_I'll call for Touya at midnight." Sakura decides._

"_Sure, stay here for a while. We can study some more." Syaoran yawns._

"_Oh, yeah, I want to ask you this math question I had trouble with earlier. It's on page—Syaoran?" Sakura glances over at her companion when she receives no response._

_Syaoran has fallen fast asleep on the sofa._

_Sakura blushes at Syaoran's sleeping form. _He is so cute,_ she thought, resisting the urge to brush back a piece of his chestnut coloured hair which has fallen across his closed amber eyes._

_She sits still and listens to his deep and calm breathing. Gathering up her courage, she leans down, and softly places a kiss on his cheek._

_Instantly, she pulls back. _

"_What am I doing?! He has a girlfriend! He loves Karu! Bad, Sakura, bad!"_

_Shutting her math book, Sakura pull out her cell phone and dials for Touya to come pick her up. She never forgave herself for doing what she did that night. Luckily, Syaoran wasn't awake to know of anything. Or else he'll never forgive her also._

_**

* * *

**_

"I never thought you'll have it in you to kiss him, Saku." Syaoran muses.

"I—I—didn't mean to. I—didn't know what came over me. I—never forgave myself. I know he's beyond my hopes and he has a girlfriend, but—"

"Relax, Sakura." Syaoran laughs.

"He'll hate me if he knew about it."

"I'm sure he won't be."

"How would you know?"

"I just do. He'll understand what you were feeling." Syaoran said. He pauses. "Even though he doesn't reciprocates your feelings towards him, he won't be mad at you." He adds as an afterthought.

They sit in silence.

"I love him." Sakura said, breaking the silence. "I still do. Very much so."

"You should try to move on, Sakura. It's…been quite a long time."

"I know."

A crisp wind blows pass the two, causing Sakura to shiver.

"You ok?" Syaoran asks.

"Yeah. So how are you and Karu?"

"She thinks I'm spending too much time with a girl who's just a friend. I don't know why she won't trust me. I don't know why she doubts my love for her. It…hurts. To know that she doubts my feelings for her."

"Are you ever going to make that speech to her?" Sakura asks.

"I don't know." Syaoran shrugs. "Are you ever going to tell that guy that you love him?"

Sakura hesitates. "I'm not sure. I'll never come out directly and say it. But…he's not a stupid person. I'm sure he knows that I love him already. And…if he doesn't speak out, then it must means his heart belongs to another girl."

"I'm sure he knows too." Syaoran whispers softly, wondering if Sakura is even able to hear him.

Not giving away whether she heard him or not, Sakura gives a small nod. "And that is why I won't…give a direct confession. What I feel towards him will be kept dearly in my heart. Always. And…I don't know if I'll ever stop loving him. But I'm going to try and move on."

"That's a good choice." Syaoran agrees. They sat in silence as the clock tower chimes ten times.

"I should get going." Sakura stands up. "It's already ten o'clock and I still have calculus homework."

"Do you need any help?" Syaoran asks. "I can come over and—"

"No, it's ok, Syaoran-kun. I think I can manage." Sakura smiles. "I hope that whatever happens between you and Karu will happen for the best, and only the best."

"I hope so too."

Sakura gets up from the snow, and brushes the soft flakes from her pants. As she starts to walk off, she heard Syaoran's voice calling her.

"Sakura?"

"Yeah?" she turns.

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"For telling me."

Sakura tenses. "For telling you…what?"

"For telling me…your own story." Syaoran gives her a grateful smile. "You're a great friend. Always and forever."

"You're welcome, Syao-kun." Sakura smiles.

"Thanks for telling me your story, Sakura." Syaoran said again. _And…thank you for not telling me who he is._

"I have to go now. I'll see you tomorrow. Good night." And with that, Sakura starts on her way back home.

Syaoran sighs and brushes snow off from his hair as he continues to sit there in silence.

"Syaoran?" a soft voice calls. Syaoran's feels his heart leap in surprise. He quickly turns around and comes face to face with a beautiful girl with teary hazel coloured eyes. Her waist length hair is blowing softly in the wind, and she is wearing a white toque on her head.

Syaoran quickly gets up from his spot. However, he doesn't move towards her.

"Hey," he mumbles, unsure of what to say.

"I—I'm sorry. I'm, so, so, so, sorry." The girl leaps into his arms and cries on his shoulder. Syaoran stands there, shock at the sudden impact of the girl. However, it doesn't take long for him to react and wraps his arm around her tightly.

"Don't be," he mumbles into her hair. "I love you."

"You shouldn't. I'm not worthy of your love."

"What are you talking about?" Syaoran frowns.

"I—I was here all along. I saw the whole thing between you and—"

"Karu, listen to me—"

"No, Syaoran, _you_ listen to _me_. I'm always such a jealous person. I always knew that Sakura loves you. I knew she loves you when you first ask me to be your girlfriend. I—I should have said no. I should have said no, Sakura loves you, and you two belong together. But…I was selfish, and wanted you to be _my_ boyfriend because…because I love you too. And…compare to Sakura's love, my love for you is nothing. I haven't known you for as long, I'm not as selfless as Sakura, and I can't even imagine losing you. Sakura deserves you much more than I do and—"

Syaoran silences her with a kiss. Karu gasps, but soon returns the kiss with just as much passion, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Don't say that," he scolds her lightly. "I know I've been a jerk. I shouldn't have been doing things that make you feel threatened. I didn't know…but…now I do." Syaoran said, thinking back to Sakura's story.

And he kisses her again.

**

* * *

**

Two figures watch the lovers from a distance.

"I thought you love him."

"I do, Tomoyo-chan."

"I thought you want him to be your boyfriend."

"I do, Tomoyo-chan."

"Why didn't you take advantage of their break-up, console him, and mend his broken heart by spending more time with him? Don't you know that's the easiest way you could have got Syaoran?" the lavender haired girl has a perplex expression on her face.

"I do know that, Tomoyo-chan."

"Then why didn't you use their break up to your advantage, Sakura?" the perplex expression still on Tomoyo's face.

Sakura watch the couple with a small smile. It is a smile of happiness, pain, relief, and reminiscence.

"Because, I love him."

* * *

**Sugar Pink:** Yay!! I finally finished it!!! Yayayayaya!!

I'm sorry for those S and S fans out there. The reason I wrote the story like this because in usual stories, the readers will most likely hate the third person in the S and S relationship. I can imagine most readers—though not all—hating the guy who's trying to take Sakura from Syaoran or the girl who's trying to take Syaoran from Sakura.

In this story, I want to portray that it's perfectly okay for the guy to like another girl. Yes, the S and S couple is cute and I'm a big fan of them still, but I want to move away from the cliché of the third person being hated, or ends up with some other OC.

Also, I want to portray that love isn't about having that person, and as long as that they are happy, that all that matters.

And, also, I had wanted to make the message "some things are better left known, yet unsaid" stand out.

I don't know if I did a good job with it though. Oh well. Hope you guys had a fun read though!

Please leave a review!!!!!! I LOVE to hear from you!!!


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